Afternoon Tea With Genocidal Gods
by ExoZadakh
Summary: Joshua and Zamasu have a short chat.


Joshua, Composer of Shibuya, set down his cup and leaned back in his chair. "I think you should give it up."

Zamasu, Supreme Kai of the 10th Universe, raised an eyebrow. "I beg your pardon?"

"Your Project 0 Mortal, of course. I think you should quit while you're ahead."

Zamasu set down his cup as well. "Really? And why is that?"

"Well to be frank, your entire premise is faulty, and one way or another I'm betting it'll fail anyway."

There was a pause as Joshua took a drink of his tea.

"I must say it seems a bit rude," Zamasu said, "to be so totally dismissive of your host. I don't have to tolerate your presence here, you know."

Pushing back a strand of hair, Joshua said, "Come now, Supreme Kai, can't we discuss a simple disagreement like civilized deities? You should learn how to take criticism."

Zamasu sighed, picking up his saucer. "The sooner I'm free of you, the better."

"I'd love nothing more than to be out of your hair. But there's no telling when my ride will get here, so why don't you simply indulge me to pass the time?"

"What's there to indulge?" Zamasu said, pausing to take a sip. "I already know that I am doing the right thing, and that it is presumptuous of you to claim otherwise when you are foreign to this entire reality. I have spent centuries watching mortals and their folly—it has been made clear to me that they will not change, and that they must be removed for the good of the world. How could you understand?"

Joshua took another sip. "I told you, didn't I? Our roles are a bit similar: I'm also tasked with watching over my little slice of reality, and guiding those within its borders. And not long ago, I thought it was best to wash my hands of it."

Zamasu looked up. "Is that so?"

"Of course, my jurisdiction only includes one city. But I definitely felt the people I watched over were dangerous and hopeless, and that wiping them out was the best thing to do for the sake of my neighbors." He chuckled. "Then again, I knew to stay _within_ my jurisdiction."

With a grunt, Zamasu took a sip. "In an effort to move things along, I shall overlook that snide comment." He set down his tea and folded his hands before his face. "So tell me, Joshua. If you also saw the folly of mortals, if you also were prepared to smite them with your own hand, what was it that stopped you? What is it that compels you to speak against such a thing now?"

After taking a long drink, Joshua smiled and said, "The short answer is, I spent some time with them."

"Hmph," Zamasu scoffed. "Meeting an arrogant mortal was exactly what motivated my other self to enact this plan."

"I guess it's the long answer then." He set down his tea and shifted in his seat, crossing one leg over the other. "You see Zamasu, the mortal I decided to spend my time with was the most insufferable, most stubborn, most unlikely to change individual that I could find within all of Shibuya. And over the course of only three weeks, he proved me wrong. He changed."

Zamasu stroked his chin. "Really…"

"It was quite a shock to me. Granted he was under some rather extreme circumstances, and that might've had something to do with the leaps and bounds he took, but he _did_ take them when I was certain he wouldn't. He hated people even more than I did, and by the end of it all he chose to fight to keep people the way they were. He learned to appreciate others and their differences, rather than angrily dismissing them as he always had. It was really quite moving."

"Hm."

Joshua cocked his head. "You don't agree? Like I said, he was the last person I ever expected to change, but he did. If he can learn, then that means it's possible for anyone to grow. If mortals still possess that capacity, then I'd say there's still a chance for them, and wiping them out would be foolish."

Zamasu leaned back, staring down his nose at Joshua. "So now I'm a fool?"

The Composer rolled his eyes. Reaching again for his teacup, he said, "Will it make you feel better if I say even a wise man can commit foolish acts? If so I'll say it, and then we can just leave your classification ambiguous and move on."

Zamasu waited for Joshua to finish his tea before getting to his feet. "Much as I would like to pass judgment on you now, I remain possessed by a morbid curiosity that I will have to satisfy first."

Joshua returned his teacup to its saucer. "Oh?"

"This little tale of yours explains why you disagree with my plan, but that was not all you said. You also claimed I was destined to fail even if I did proceed."

"That's right."

"Care to elaborate on that point?"

"Well, it's more or less the same elaboration. You're putting your mortal opponents in very extreme circumstances. Their reaction to that, in all likelihood, will be to grow in leaps and bounds to survive. And if that requires eclipsing you, then they will."

Zamasu laughed. "None of the mortals of countless other worlds have had such a reaction, oh wise Composer. Why should this one be any different?"

Joshua smirked. "You tell me."

In an instant, the mirth was gone from Zamasu's face.

"You said it was an arrogant mortal who inspired your counterpart to commit to this plan, didn't you? What did he do that was offensive?"

"He was vain enough to challenge me, a god, to a fight. Granted, the me of another timeline, but nevertheless—"

"And who won?"

Zamasu clenched his teeth. "…That isn't the point."

"So, he did."

"This was no ordinary mortal! He possesses some bizarre transformation that allows him to appropriate godly energy for his own."

"Oh, and is that what he used to beat you? Or, the other you?"

Zamasu said nothing.

"Hmhm…entertaining as this is, I suppose I should get to the point." Joshua stood and leaned forward. "What world did that mortal come from?"

After a long pause, Zamasu said, "He is long-dead in this timeline. All of his allies, too. All that remains is one boy."

Joshua grinned. "And that right there is my point, Zamasu—the reason I know you're going to fail. You're certain all you have to deal with is one boy, but I can guarantee you this…that boy _won't_ be alone."

Zamasu scowled, but Joshua paid him no mind as he took a few steps away.

"Thanks for the tea. It's really been lovely chatting with you, but if you'll excuse me, I believe my ride is almost here." Looking over his shoulder, he added, "Take care, Zamasu. I do hope your opponent will be as forgiving as mine was."

* * *

Notes:

-A very short, fairly pointless story, but I've been trying to think of something TWEWY-related to write and when this idea came to me it just made me chuckle.


End file.
